I noticed something unsettling in a leadership email
We're caught in a trap and we don't know it.
I read an email this week from a leadership author I deeply respect.
He shared six questions he uses in one-on-one meetings to help develop leaders.
The questions were thoughtful, practical, and effective. But as I read them, I noticed that most of the questions pointed people back to themselves.
What are you doing about it?
Who’s going to help you solve it?
What’s your plan?
Again, for leadership development, those are decent questions. But they get people into “figure out mode” instead of “receiving mode”.
So what if there’s a deeper question? What if the most important thing isn’t figuring out what we’re going to do... but noticing what God is already doing?
I think many of us have been trained to approach life as if we’re the primary actor and God is the occasional consultant. We hit a challenge and immediately start searching for answers.
We strategize. We analyze. We work harder.
And only when we’ve studied everything out do we ask God to help.
But what if He’s already with you?
What if He’s already moving and speaking?
What if the invitation from God isn’t to carry more responsibility, but to enter into His rest?
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
- Matthew 11:28-30
When someone shares a struggle or challenge with me, I don’t ask them “What are you going to do about it?”
Instead we go into prayer and we might ask: “Lord, what are You already doing here?”
Or: “Lord, what do You want me to know about this challenge?”
Or: “Lord, what would You invite me to do here?”
Everything changes when we move from striving (I’ll figure this out) to noticing (God has already figured this out).
From managing life for God to experiencing life with God.
And these aren’t just questions for yourself. They’re powerful questions for your spouse, children, friends, coworkers…
So the next time someone shares a challenge, resist the urge to immediately solve it.
Instead, try asking:
What are you afraid of in this? Can you give those fears to Jesus?
If God is for your good, then what is He already doing in this?
What would it look like to face this with Him instead of by yourself?
Then get curious together. Pray together. Listen together.
And don’t panic if they don’t hear anything profound. God isn’t under pressure. He knows how to reach His children.
Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is create enough space for people to become aware of Him.
And if someone feels stuck, I’ve found two gentle questions can often open a deeper conversation:
“What are you afraid of?”
“Is there anyone you need to forgive?” (including yourself)
Fear and unforgiveness have a way of making God’s voice seem distant.
God is closer than we think… like, way closer. One might even say He is in us.
“On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you.”
- John 14:20
He’s not waiting for you to figure everything out. He’s already at work in your life today.
The invitation is simply to notice. And then join Him in the work He’s already doing.
with love,
Tyson
p.s. - We are making some changes to the Receive Academy. The only way you can come in is if you join a Hearing God Challenge. We will be leading these challenges every month, but the intent is that we create opportunities for groups of people to come in at one time, forming a cohort of sorts, so that you can develop friendships with like-minded people coming into the community at the same time.
Needless to say, lots of amazing things happening and people entering into more freedom from fear and shame.
p.s.s - Some of you on this email list are paid subscribers. And since you are, I’d like to give you some additional insight as a thank you…
I’ve included below, six questions I would use in a coaching conversation, along with reflection prompts, journaling questions, and a simple prayer exercise you can use with yourself, your spouse, a friend, or even a small group.
